Baby Boomers Communication

desire it to be.

One Question of Communication

There is an essential question that should be asked when involved in communication: "Do I want to be right, or do I want to have relationship?" Many times we argue from our perception as if it were the undeniable truth; in fact, another perspective may be equally as valid. If we truly understand, with the desire to have a better relationship, most times we will find that being right is secondary to having relationship.

Counting on Communication

by Brian Frizzell

Have you ever said exactly what you meant and somebody got it all wrong? In twenty years of counseling, I have observed that communication is the number one challenge of relationships. My wife and I have been married for twenty-three years, now are approaching our 50's and still find communication to be our greatest challenge. Both professionally and personally, I am finding that if the communication barrier is overcome, all other obstacles to relationships can usually be worked through. There are a number of components that we can count on to help our relationship add up to all that we

Two Types of Communication

Much like your radio has two frequencies, so to does communication. One is FM communication and the other is AM communication. Feeling Mode (FM) communication has to do with conveying and understanding on an emotional level. Most often, the female gender wants to be understood in this mode. Fixing the problem is not as important as just talking about it experientially. Assessment Mode (AM) is the frequency where most men tune. This emphasizes rational solutions. For a man, many times there is a quest for coming up with a way to fix the problem. Emotions are not the solution. Actions are the solution. The problem is obvious; communication is being handled on different frequencies. The best way to overcome this is to create a new frequency, XM. Cross over into each other's frequency to understand on an emotional and rational level.

Three Challenges To Communication

Inconvenience. It takes time to communicate accurately and precisely. Many communication barriers begin to be built because it is not considered to be a priority; there are other more important things. This neglect often leads to a crisis that has to be addressed. It is rather like paying taxes; paying as you go is much easier than receiving a large debit to be dealt with all at once.
Observation. Observation incorporates both verbal and non-verbal communication. Specialists in the area of communication state that often non-verbal messages may be more important than verbal communication. What is being said by body language, voice inflection, eye contact, and facial expression?
Understanding. Many times we are so intent on getting our point across we never really understand where our partner is coming from. I have developed a system of communication I call "Hide and Seek Communication." This entails hiding our response and seeking out what our partner is saying. It is about seeking to understand before being understood.

These are some core components of good communication. Understanding and applying these will give us communication that we can count on.